I've been dating Kel for close to 5 months now. 5 months.... It seems that I am so used to him now.... Used to seeing him around.... Used to having him running errands for me... Used to him being around when I just have no one to go out with. I can be almost sure that he's with me not only for sex... But he is truly, genuinely falling in love with me. He wants to go into a serious relationship with me. I should be happy, shouldn’t I? Yes right, he is not rich, he is young, he is not that handsome and he is still studying. But, above all of these, the least of the least, HE IS TRUE TO ME. Isn’t that the most important factor?

However, sometimes…. Just sometimes… I still can’t forget the times with ‘him’. Just that day, Kel and I were talking about shavers on the bus…. I was suddenly reminded of the times when he always cut himself when he shaves his moustache. I use to laugh at him and he used to shave my armpit for me using his shaver. Those little intimates’ moments that we share, I will never in my life forget. I suddenly turned quiet throughout the whole bus ride back to Jurong. I looked outside of the window and continue to think about those times that we share. Sometimes when I am eating something that I like, I would start to imagine how life would be like if we were still together. When I wore pants and shirt to work, I would think to myself that he would love it if he ever sees me in that outfit. I sometimes feel that my heart is only open for him and no one else. Maybe that’s the reason why I do not want to commit to Kel….. I am just confused… I am so used to Kel that I am not so sure if I really like him…

Somewhere out there, I wish You are happy and thinking of me tonight… J

Signing off,
Adri